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This Is How You Do Divorce

A German man, unhappy with a court order to split everything 50/50 with his unfaithful ex wife, decided to take the order literally by sawing their belongings in half.

He then placed his half of the items on ebay for sale, and gave each an amusing but bitter write up.

“The car is quite well preserved for its age, but there are some signs of wear. In particular, half is missing”

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“In my opinion, this conversion is the perfect solution for users who want to save space, but can not afford a MacBook Air”

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“The wheel moves despite minor limitations, and the front brake engages perfectly”

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“Unlike my ex-wife, I cannot say anything bad about the bed, really, have always slept well in it”

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“It’s the perfect phone for people who do not like to make calls”

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“The chairs are super as an art installation”

Illustration for article titled This Is How You Do Divorce

“There’s no need for cuddling stuffed animals – for such things, there are affectionate co-workers”

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“Watching TV alone is already depressing enough. The device is very compact and has several inputs, but am not sure whether they all work”

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“In recent years, I’ve spent many beautiful evenings on this sofa with my woman. She did not find the evenings so beautiful, which is why my ex-wife now sits on another couch”

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“Whoever wonders where the second half is may want to check with my ex-wife”

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“I offer here, in my opinion, the best REM album… “Everybody Hurts” (how true !!!) and Nightswimming are the best passages on it yet”

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“Unfortunately, I can offer only half… But no matter, I have made sure that the best sketches are on my half”

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“It is considerably smaller and more manageable. In addition, you will finally be at peace with this phone: It is guaranteed not to ring and vibrate and will not play music”

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via CNBC

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