I was a bad neighbor today.
My neighbor wanted to use my bathroom, and I turned her down.
My bathroom, in all honesty, is not public property. Aside from my collection of books and magazines, lip glosses, allergy accoutrements, and toothbrush, there's other stuff. Sometimes, it might be luna pads taking up space in the bathtub. Or there may be an abundance of hair - I try to collect it, but shedding is my superpower. Other times, it just may not be that clean. I don't mind it that way, and I know nobody else will be in the space, so they won't mind, either.
[Aside: I feel like Doogie Howser, talking about my feelings as I type.]
My neighbor was having some work done in her apartment, and needed to use a bathroom. She turned to me. I answered the door with lotion on my hands, stuck in that 'there's lotion on my hands' position. My lip gloss was half on. I was going somewhere within ten minutes. There's no way I could have done a quick pickup to make it presentable. So, I said no.
We don't live in the middle of nowhere. Not only are there other apartments, there are shops of various sorts, some of them rather large and bathroom-containing.
Had the tables been turned, well, that's where things get interesting. It would never occur to me to knock on someone's door in order to use their bathroom. A typical trait of someone with Asperger's (i.e., me) is the fact that it doesn't occur to them to ask for help. If I knew my bathroom was being worked on, I'd go somewhere public. If it were a surprise, I'd be surprised, and then go somewhere public. If I needed a shower, I'd go to my gym. There's no scenario that would make me knock on a neighbor's door for a non-emergency bathroom visit.
This neighbor is one I've written about before. Most famously when she knocked on my door at 9 PM just to talk. So, I guess that I can see that I'm not the only one with social cue challenges. I feel a little bad for having turned her away, a little bad about the kind of person it makes me appear to be, but I mostly just feel blah at having been put in that position.
If you're a friend, and you visit, it will be in presentable shape. Friends of mine know to prearrange visits.
Just don't surprise me, I may surprise you back with a 'no'.