Getting the best of you.


A compendium of sins in this first winter storm:

1. Confused middle aged lady slides towards the center of the lane because she decided to save money on tires.


2. Joe Schmoe decides to floor it to make it up the hill, burning rubber and skidding and perhaps forgetting that he does not have 4-wheel drive.

3. 20something woman pumps her brakes, skidding out, on icey road. YOU NEED TO DECELERATE.

4. Jerkwad in jerkward car drives 20 miles above the regular speed limit, passing cars during a storm when the roads are unsalted increasing the likelihood that he will either spin out or cut someone off.

5. Confused teenage boy in parent's red car tries to turn right on red while I'm going through the intersection. I'M NOT GONNA STOP ON A DIME. YOU NEED TO WAIT.


6. That hill near Conshohocken where everyone jerks leftwards and rightwards like a herd of goats trying to make it up the hill and mostly stalls out at a 35 degree angle half way up.

7. The genius idea not to plow or salt the road possibly until the end of the snowing after every jerkwad is dead because it's superintelligent in a metro area of 6 million with many 4 lane heavily trafficked thoroughfares just to let people take their chances.


8. Given how shitty the roads are, everyone takes their shitty cars and their shitty skills and do what stupid shit they've likely done during every other storm, figuring if they haven't died, their driving skills must be fine, experiencing that special sort of amnesia that must come after sliding in a meandering way through four lanes of traffic before ending up in a snowbank.

picture from here

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